My Ritual: On Saying No to Say Yes (Cara Meredith's blog)

Hey friends: I'm in the middle of a new website rollout. And in the middle of all those digital details, I had the pleasure of posting on my friend Cara Meredith's blog. She's a fellow Redbud Writer, and she's been featuring a lovely little series on rituals, the grooves that give our lives meaning. Hope you'll catch the rest of the post over on her blog—and let us know what you're discovering about the importance of saying no. Cheers, Suzanne


“Moving on from ___________” read the subject line in my email.

You can do this, I assure myself.

Historically, I don’t like to quit things.

I am an INFJ on the Myers-Briggs personality scale—and let me tell you, we can get things done. Consider it a function of our sheer stick-to-itiveness when we feel passionate about something.

(Read: we can’t always let opportunities, things, jobs, or people go when the timing is right.)

(And also: it could be that rituals just might help us say no more effectively.)

So I sent the email. After several years, a recent statement on the organization’s values and beliefs helped me to realize our philosophies were no longer the same. I had become “not the best fit,” and I needed to move on. I mentioned how thankful I was for the opportunity.

Coincidentally, this morning a coauthor and I dropped—as in, ceased—a publishing project I’ve been working on for a year and a half. We ourselves received a lot of “nos” and then a “we’d like to change it to this” that just didn’t work. I cannot even count the hours and emotion that went into what appears to be a failure, but at the moment, is a clear redirection. It may resurrect itself in a different season, but for now, I am being called to put the lid on all that effort. I do so with a mixture of relief, sadness and anticipation.

Read more on Cara's blog